


To Hold A Name

by Stedler2 (k9cat)



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series), Thomas Sanders
Genre: Fluff, Gen, Origin Story, Tiny!sides, World builing, discovering ones self, origin of the Sides
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-16
Updated: 2018-08-08
Packaged: 2019-06-11 13:14:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15316269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/k9cat/pseuds/Stedler2
Summary: Being pieces of a whole was always interesting, you were all the same, but also completely different.And the differences were not always visible like if you needed glasses or always wore the same colour.Each Side finds something completely unique that belongs to only them, their name.A little origin story mixed with a dash of character analysis and some head canon world build. Light, cute, and usually fluffy.





	1. Patton

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you all enjoy this, its been sitting in my files and Im finaly posting it.  
> There is no beta read on this so if I missed any spelling or grammar, please let me know!  
> Enjoy!

 

He wasn’t lonely.

 

He was just alone.

 

He’s pretty sure they are pretty much the same thing, even though he doesn’t really know the difference yet between the two.

 

It wasn’t bad to be alone. That was all he knew, but he was sure that it wasn’t what he really wanted though. Maybe he should say feel? That felt like a better thing to say. It was not very clear to him yet what exactly he was here for. He was here for something, and that was something he could figure out.

 

Being here was somewhat confusing though. His first foray into consciousness was a brief wake to seeing a vast space around him. It was all dim and muted colours, with soft edges and fuzzy inconsistencies. There was no definition and things floated around. He was still tired, so he closed his eyes and slept. He woke up again, and he found a blanket overtop of him and a pillow beneath his head on his bed.

 

It felt nice, and he smiled. He liked those things very much, the feeling. He knew he was feelings.

 

Things were simple like this and were becoming less confusing. He felt, and he wandered the vast space around him. The colours grew more vibrant, but still held a soft touch. He pulled the inconsistent floaty things down from above him and set them on the ground to see what they turned into. Sometimes they turned into shapes or objects or images of things. As they did, he learned, and it was fun to learn that that was a square, and that that was a tree. He liked it, but it felt like he could be doing better, or something could be learning better, or at least learn with him. He wished there was some one to learn with him, that would make it a lot of fun. He felt sad that there wasn’t someone, and he didn’t like the cold feeling that sad brought with it. Maybe being alone wasn’t really what he thought it was like.

 

He continued to learn anyways. He learned what No is. He learned that the same number of jelly beans meant that everyone could enjoy them all the same and that felt good. He liked it when everyone could enjoy things all the same. Yet things weren’t always fair, and he felt sad again. He especially felt sad when he learned that some people couldn’t make sure that they enjoyed things all the same as other people. He learned he was also the right-wrong feeling too. That brought a different coldness to him, the sad he learned about. He wished he had someone he could share that sad feeling with and be understood. Know that he was not alone and that he would be happy again. Being lonely wasn’t much fun anymore.

 

Running around was still fun though, but there was only so much one could do on their own. Only so many ideas before all the ideas weren’t new, and pulling the blobs down wasn’t exciting any more. He wished for someone to play with. Wished for someone to wander the space and explore with him and see what things turn in to.

 

He was alone. He was lonely. He learned what those are, and how they were different. He wished he didn’t know, but now that he knew, he didn’t really like them anymore. He was still cold, and he wished someone was here to give him a hug.

 

When he woke up this morning, everything was different. His bed was in a room, vibrant light blue walls and there was the dresser he found once. The whole room was filled full with the things he loved. This was exciting. He bounded to the white door and reached up a little bit to turn the gold handle and watched as it swung open to a hall way.

 

It was a little plain, simple beige wall, and it was still a little fuzzy, but it was a lot more clear than before and there looked to be a bigger room down the way. Be bounded down the carpet and found that there was the sofa he liked was there. In the corner there was the book case he found that one time that had really neato things in it also, but that was really it. It was still kind of empty around, not much new to explore.

 

He flopped onto the sofa all his previous excitement slowly trickling away. He laid their growing bored looking at the soft gray above him. There was no ceiling or roof over top of him, the best he could do was pretend he was looking at clouds, but the blobs never stayed in one shape long enough to identify. There was one blob though, that caught his eye when he saw it. It was gold in colour and that was interesting since all the other blobs were gray tones. He watched it float closer and he enjoyed how the blob shimmered as it moved. This had him really curious.

 

He stood up on the sofa cushion when it was getting really close, and he bounced a little bit trying to reach it. That wasn’t high enough. He climbed onto the arm, balancing precariously like being on a tight rope and reached as much as he could. His fingers brushing the edge as the gold blob came close enough and grasped a section just as his socked foot slipped from under him. He tumbled onto the cushion, landing with a quiet ‘oof’, breath gone for a moment. His vision went dark as a fluttering cloth landed on top of him. The fabric was soft and the same gold that the blob was, sparkly and shimmery under the light as he sat up. He found the fabric to be organised, settling over his shoulders nicely. There was a hood that draped a little over his eyes and moving it around to get his arms free he found that there were pockets inside. It was quite warm also, flowing down almost all the way to his ankles and being thick and fluffy.

 

It was really pretty to with embroidery and swirly patterns stitched all across the fabric in light silvery blue. A part of the edging caught his eye, and as he looked he found a name.

 

Patton.

 

A name, his name. That was his name.

 

He, Patton smiled again, and pulled the cloak around him like a hug. He dashed back to his room down the hallway, liking the way it flowed and flapped in the made wind, giggling all the way. He missed the faint out line of another door already forming next to his.

 

 

 


	2. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Imagination has to be understood somehow, and what better way than to explore it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New Chapter, yay!  
> There is also no beta read on this, so if there is any glaring spelling mistakes or grammar, please let me know, Thanks!  
> Enjoy!

 

Creativity knew things.

 

He didn’t know how he knew them, he just did and it wasn’t his place to think about stuff like that, that was for… something else. He didn’t have the words for it yet, but he knew it, somehow.

 

He knew the other one was like him, but also different, and that the two of them did things for Him and that was important. He did all the day dreaming, thinking about hopes and dreams and making stuff, while the other one gave lots of warm hugs, bright smiles and giggly laughter. It was great, but not perfect, somehow, he knew something was missing. Morality, that was the other, didn’t seem to think so, so he left it alone.

 

He also knew things changed. Sometimes they were very quick changes, like new things popping up around the mindscape, like the tree that sprouted up in the living room yet was gone the next day. But sometimes they changed slowly, he was pretty sure it took a month for a staircase to grow that was near his door, he didn’t really count the days though, and it still wasn’t finished, but it has taken forever so far. He knew he could change things too. His room was really good at that, changing even when he wasn’t thinking about it. He was still learning and getting the hang of making things, so he didn’t blame the room for changing on him when he couldn’t control that either. He kind of liked when the room changed on him though. It provided a new adventure and play for him to explore and run around in, learning what he could do to make it dramatic, to make it adventurous, to make dreams fun and entertain Him while He sleeps.

 

Tonight, was different when he stepped into his room for the dreams. He usually sat on his bed and waited for the room to change around him. Drifting thoughts wandering around influencing the shifting landscape of dreams. It was that in-between place of awake and not awake Thomas had before completely falling asleep and the dreamland was cemented in what ever fantastical combination it currently was in. Right now, though, the scape was still shifting, and he knew Thomas had completely fallen asleep, so this was new. He did not know about this. He stood up on his bed, the squishy mattress and soft blankets made for some not so stable footing, but he managed, and looked into what he could call a sky. 

 

It was dark, but not completely black since it had shifting colours in it, deep blues, rich purples, vibrant reds, all speckled with shining points of white and yellow. It was a night sky, a galaxy. Space, where things floated around and aliens hid behind asteroids. He felt himself lift off his bed, looking down from where he was floating away from, he found his bed sitting on stardust. This was a space dream. Yet it didn’t feel like a dream as he floated away from the only thing he knew. The shining points grew larger as he floated towards them, and the sparking points became shapes-ish. They weren’t full shapes, more like formless blobs of play-dough ready to be shaped. He knew where he was again.

 

He was in subconscious, or at least a part of it, maybe above it actually from the way the dark mass below him pulled like a black hole, wanting to suck everything back inside. But it didn’t, because he belonged out here with Morality and Thomas and they had fun. Subconscious was where strange things came from, like the shapeless shapes, and it was to be left unexplored, even for an adventurer like him, he knew when to leave the unknown alone.

 

One shapeless blob drifted close enough to touch, he reached out and grazed the edge. The dull yellow morphed into a crown and he was delighted. It looked like a crown for royalty. He smiled and grabbed the hat and placed it upon his head.

 

He continued to float, and when the blobs came close enough, he touched them. One turned into a chair, another a bunch of paper that scattered in some unfelt wind. One turned into a stuffed animal that was in a shape of a puppy, it drifted past too quick for him to grab for Morality, he would have to try and recreate it for him. This was fun, but there was something missing. He knew there was something missing. He looked around the floating space with all the shapes, and spotted something that wasn’t quite like the others, but still the same. Instead of white or dull yellow, it was a vibrant and shining gold, and instead of floating around aimlessly like the others, it seemed to have a direct course, right to him.

 

He knew it was special, he didn’t know how he knew that, but he did. He knew that it was for him in this void of being a part of a whole, and that it was only for him to hold. He knew that it was coming to him, and that he was going to it. It came closer, just as shapeless and formless as all the other blobs, and he reached out to touch the shimmering gold.

 

The gold shifted, forming a beautiful sword, balanced and sturdy, worthy of a knight, a prince. He looked upon the hilt where rubies, amethyst, sapphire and aquamarine were inlayed, and found a name engraved among the pretty swirling shining gold.

 

Roman, his name.

 

A name which was his.

 

He smiled, it felt right, a prince that had a crown and held a sword, Prince Roman. He liked that, and he knew what he was to dream of every night.

 

The space shifted around him again, his room formed for a second before dissolving into a field full of wildflowers. The wind softly drifted by carrying the fragrant sent of the forest and he heard the call of bird song. In the distance, there was a grand castle framed by mountains, and he knew that this land was waiting for a prince to explore it.

 

A new quest, fit for a prince. Holding his sword, Roman went and explored.

~*~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!   
> Comments and kudos are always wonderful to see, or come by and chat on tumblr, @k9cat!


	3. Logan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Learning is great, especially when you learn more about yourself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, this isn't beta read, so if there are any glaring spelling or grammar mistakes please let me know,   
> Thanks, and Enjoy!

 

He was not tired. Even though it had been a very long day. Logic was tucked in tight under his sheet and quilt thanks to Morality. He insisted that he could go to bed himself without help, but it was nice to have someone else perfectly pull the blankets up for him, optimizing comfort for rest.

 

It really had been a full day with lots of things learned and explored. They went on a field trip to the zoo, and he was practically allowed to direct the whole thing all by himself. Creativity and Morality were right by his shoulders, asking just as may questions as he was, but they never tried to budge in front of him. his mind was just buzzing will all the things Thomas had discovered, trying to understand all the information easily keeping him awake.

 

He really wanted to go to his desk and find his notebook, pull it out and just write all the things about today. But, he was tucked in well, like, really well. Soft, warm and very comfortable, he would give that to Morality. Yet that left him stuck under his blanket looking at the celling. But that wasn’t as bad as it sounded, it looked like the night sky. Little flickers and flairs of ideas and thoughts shining a rainbow of stars above him. It was incredibly beautiful to look at, really fascinating, and he has thought on numerous occasions to ask Creativity to join him for a sleep over, he too would love the stars.

 

Sometimes a flair would float down like a firefly and he would catch it. he would observe and learn and think about the idea that came down with it or ponder the many branches of thoughts that came from one. With that, he would go to his desk and write it down filling notebooks and journals and binders all alike and put them on the shelves that show up in his room.

 

He looked over to his desk across the room. There were already so many thoughts to write down from today, but he really didn’t want to get out of bed. Logic tore his gaze away from the unachievable goal and glanced to his nightstand. There was the usual array of pens and other neat junk that accumulates on empty flat surfaces, like books, his watch, the cloth he uses to clean his glasses, and plenty of other neat little knickknacks that sat under the light of the lamp. He spied under the mess a sheet or two of looses leaf paper. Perfect! That would be enough for tonight to get his preliminary ideas out, jot notes to expand on later. He pealed back his warm blankets and reached over. He snagged a pen and gently tugged the paper from under the pile careful to not spill any of the contents to the floor.

 

Everything was going to plan, except that it was very difficult to write on the paper as it was on his blankets. The soft material was not a firm and stable enough surface to let the pen glide across the surface. There was nothing near him that would be suitable to substitute for a desk top. The closest book did not nearly have enough surface space and would really only make it more frustrating.

 

Logic flopped back onto his pillows, thinking upon ways and trying to figure out how to make this work. He absently let his eyed wander over the stars above him, seeing them twinkle and dance in place. It was not long before a particularly gold flicker caught his eye and gained his full attention.

 

He had never seen a gold star before, various tones of orange and yellow, yes, but this had a deep shimmer that could not be replicated by the simple shades of the rainbow. He was not sure at all if this gold star was supposed to be an idea or a though, but he was very eager to find out. The star slowly made its way closer to him. Almost a straight path to where he was laying.

 

Curiosity overtook him, making him impatient for its arrival. Sitting up, he observed the star, now looking a lot more like a firefly, minutely adjust its course to again float directly to him. That made him even more curious than before. It was something to discover and learn about, to see if what he thinks is true on not. He stood up on his bed. The soft material shifting under his footing and giving into his weight since it was focused on a much smaller area. The firefly once again adjusted its course. That was good support for his thoughts. He moved to the left a couple steps, carful to not trip and fall on the blankets, he watched how the sparkling gold followed him. He tried it again moving to the right, and once again, the gold idea followed him where he went with the same result.

 

That made Logic smile a bit, liking how his ideas and thoughts were true when it came to actually performing them. He was ever so interested in the gold firefly that hung above him, still slowly making its way to him. He jumped lightly on his mattress, the soft springiness giving him slightly more lift than usual. It took a few jumps, and a couple missed swings to grasp it, but when he did so finally reach it, he did not let go.

 

The idea bloomed to like in his mind like a flower reaching outward to the sun as far as it could go. The image of an intricately carved golden shield developed in his minds eye, the way it glimmered. How it was a strong and sturdy, a perfect circle. It was beautiful, more so than the sky above him and even more special. He really wanted it, so much to be real.

 

The muted puff of something large landing on his blanket was heard from beside him, drawing his attention outward once again. He looked over and discovered that the shield he saw was there, pristine as could be, gold even more shimmery. It was perfectly shined and just a pretty as he thought it could be.

 

Logic carefully sat down and gently grasped the edge of the cool metal, pulling the shield closer. The inside of the shield had neat straps to fit over his arms or one to let it sit across his back. The front convex was perfectly smooth, the border intricately carved with swirls and cut indents that reflected light to look like stars. The front was perfect for writing on.

 

He shuffled back till he was supported by the pillows and the headboard. He put his shield on his lap, the curve gentle enough to be at a nice angle to write, and he laid the papers on top. He had his pen in place ready to write when something once again caught his eye. On the edge with all the carving was a name inscribed into the metal.

 

Logan.

 

Which, when he connected the dots, was his name. 

 

Logan Logic Sanders.  

 

He like it very much, smoothing out his paper he wrote it at the top of the page first. He then titled it and began to write.


	4. Virgil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even on the most restless nights, you can find something out about yourself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!   
> This again isn't proof read so if there are any mistakes I would like to be notified,   
> Enjoy!

It was a night of tossing and turning. Anxiety knew it as soon as he stepped back into his bedroom. Sleep was not a close friend right now, he could tell by the ache that pressed in the back of his head, and he really wanted it today too. 

He didn’t know how Morality did it. There was a knock at his door, the sweet- the too sweet smile of the bubbly trait was shown and everyone knew you didn’t say no to him, and he found himself in the commons with the others. 

Creativity was planning something and Logic already looked exasperated with what ever was going on. That was already enough warning for him and he tried to nope out, and Creativity got huffy and Morality felt sad and Logic looked even more exasperated and… and they hadn’t even begun what ever was planned when Creativity stormed out and everything kind of fell away.   
So now he was laying. Laying in his almost too big bed thinking about all the things that went wrong today because of him, half swallowed by the blankets surrounding and swaddling him. He was too tired too actually be tired anymore. He had tried counting down, he found and played soft music, he did relaxing stretches. He even messed around with his blankets and pillows. Earlier in the evening Logic had found him in the living room and shared the tea he had made, mentioning something about quiet company and then proceeded to ramble about the tea, he was too distracted with his own thinking to full pay attention. Nothing seemed to work. 

So, he let his mind wander and float in the half-asleep state that eventually toppled him on the wakeful side of consciousness. The absolute darkness of his room was tempered by the amber nightlight and the all-consuming silence that hung above him was dampened by the soft drizzle of rain outside his window. The tapping and pattering of drops on the panes of glass created a soothing drone that has always helped him calm down. He let the sound fill the room quietly. Surrounding him and the chaotic thoughts that pestered in an insulating blanket that soothed them, and he breathed. Four, seven, eight, and things were okay. 

Cocooned by the steady grounding sound he kept his mind open to all the bubbly thoughts that floated up out of nowhere. Sometimes they were nice thoughts, sometimes they were not so nice. He drifted and soon found himself floating in the in-between of here and aware and present, and the deeper unknown of the subconscious that always had that persistent tug. Always feeling like it wanted to drag them back down into the whole that He was. Yet he continued to float on top, meeting the colourful bubbles that rose up from the subconscious.   
He always popped as many bubbles as possible before they got to Thomas and he was surprised by the ideas inside of them. Sometimes they were nice ideas and he rebubbled them and pushed them up to the front. Letting the ideas become dreams or thoughts to ponder. But most times they were not nice, intrusive and hurtful things and he crushed the content so that they could never be used and he threw them away. 

Those types of thoughts would never get to Thomas if he could help it, but sometimes there were so many and inevitably one or two always slipped through and there was nothing he could do about it.   
Tonight in his floating and popping of bubbles, he noticed a rather large bubble rising right up to him, or maybe he was in its path. It was hard to tell. It was a shining gold colour shimmering in the ambient amber light. It looked so pretty, and he felt that it was special compared to all the other bubbles in the normal rainbow of tones. He really wanted to pop this bubble and see what was inside of it. 

As he looked at it as it floated closer, he realized why it was so special. The bubble was only for him, it was his. All the others had something special too them, this was his something special. With how everything was so tangled together in the mindscape he couldn’t go in one direction or the other without running into something that the others had made of conjured up. But this was his thing, so shiny and honestly beautiful in the dreary land that surrounded him. he really wanted to know what was inside.   
He reached out when it came close enough, meeting the bubble as it floated closer. His fingers just brushed the surface when the bubble burst. The idea bloomed to life inside his mind. Gold, glittery, shimmery special gold. Strong, protection, insurance of safety. Something that would always be with him. Anxiety opened his eyes watching how the gold sparkle from the burst bubble drifted down over him. shining gold coating him and sticking. A new weight settled on his shoulders as he watched strong valiant armor cover his chest and back over his sweater. I was beautiful.   
The weight felt nice, like a tether grounding him, halting him from floating away any further. He looked over the breastplate, pretty scrollwork edged and decorated the border. The swirls were mesmerising, etched and carved like curls of storm clouds. In his looking he noticed something distinct, just by the collar was probably the nicest cursive he’d ever seen declaring a name. 

Virgil. 

A name. His name, that was his name. 

He smiled a smile he hadn’t had much reason to share, bright and nice feeling. A tightness he didn’t realize he was carrying lessened over his chest. The comfortable weight of the breastplate had a certain soothing pressure and he settled away from the bubbles and floating for the night. 

Virgil turned over under his warm quilt and sheets pulling them closer. Finally settling into the sleep he was looking for. 

 

~*~

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> Kudos and Comments are always wonderful, and Im always open to talking, my tumblr is k9cat.


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